I wear my feelings on my sleeves….it’s all out
there and there is nothing to be ashamed of. After many years of playing mind
games and going through emotional roller-coasters, I would rather put it out
there. I take my disappointments straight up like a shot of tequila and I love
like big teddy bear hugs. That is what I always want to be, honest with my
feelings. Keeping it real may be too overrated but I think it’s the best way to
through life…know what is coming your way.
I won’t lie; I do know how to hide feelings. There
are so many crushes that I have had and never flinched at the sight of that
person. But I think hiding feelings is like hiding a bad cough…uncomfortable
and torturous. I know why people hide feelings, fear of disappointment and
failure. But I think you lose either way, if you don’t express how you feel.
Recently I have been on a streak of disappointments
from friends and those who claim to be close to me. But I believe wearing my
feelings on my sleeves has helped me get through it. If I let you know how I feel
and you openly do not reciprocate my feelings, at least I will know I am not
wasting my time with someone who doesn’t want to be with me. Wouldn’t you feel
betrayed if you found out the one person who thought loved you was just wearing
a façade of feelings for you? I know I would.
Being open about how I feel has brought me
through a lot of situations. I have had great victories as well; I have found
true friends, gotten a lot of my chest and also realized the friends that I do
not need. I would rather be alone than live a life surrounded by fake emotions.
I have managed to wean out those who feel nothing for me and kept the real friends,
friends who I know where I stand with no pretending.
I know the worst bout of hidden feelings
usually come up in relationships. People would rather be honest with friends
and strangers about how they feel rather than that one person who they feel
something about. Heartbreak is a fear that has driven apart so many people who
would have been great together. I wonder why people just can’t relax and feel
the way they feel.
Liberation comes with honesty, being honest
with yourself will help you nurse heartbreak much faster than being in denial
about it. I hope I will always be honest with myself….wear my feelings on my
sleeves and get a thick skin against all the disappointments that come my way….for
me, life is too short to live in a bubble of lies.
TC! :-*
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